i <3 Okinawa

So it's day 4 of my getaway. It feels like time stopped, like I'm in some sort of dream or something. There isn't a clock in our car or the lodge that we're staying at so i never know the actual time of day which feels kind of good i guess. So far, i really like Okinawa. The people here are so friendly and their stuff is so cool and cute. The weather here is actually pretty nice. It's not hot and humid at all! Everything just feels so chill and relaxed. And did i mention how delicious the food is? haha I'm probably getting fat from eating all the time.. but how could i resist? I think the only thing i miss so far is the sunshine in california. I miss the clear blue skies and perfect weather. Other than that, i'm happy here.

Vamoose

Today, technically in the wee hours of tomorrow morning, i will be leaving to go to Japan! I will be staying in Japan for one week and Taiwan for one week which brings me back Friday night, June 5th. I wish i could stay longer.. two weeks seems too short! Oh well, i'm just glad i even get to go. Earlier in the semester i told my mom i wanted to get out of the country this summer. Everything was planned kind of on a whim (which is probably why i'm only going to be gone for 2 weeks). I'm not exactly sure what i'm going to be doing over there. I haven't even started to pack! GAH! All i know is that my flight is at 1:15AM. I should start packing -.- Farewell cruel world! I finally get to escape..

Today I officially graduated from YBSJ training

H e l l o S u m m e r :)

i have officially survived sophomore year! Actually, i should wait for my grades to be processed before i proclaim anything like that.. Sophomore year has completely kicked my butt. I have never slacked off in school this much before -.- In a final attempt to raise my grades, i have been studying my butt off this entire week. I really hope i pass my political science class (i knew i should have taken better notes in that class). Anyways, there's no use in remorse at this point. All i can do is pray that my GPA doesn't suffer too much from my lack of effort this semester. I am determined to get myself back on track in the fall. On a brighter note, i haven't felt this free since January. I feel like i can finally breathe! Now all i have to worry about is packing up all my stuff to move out of the dorms. I don't even know where to start..

Just Keep Swimming

I'm pretty sure many of you have heard the saying "time stops for no one.." As i find myself in the midst of finals week, i find that notion oddly comforting. I know that phrase is usually used in a negative light but as of right now it only brings me pure hope. It's comforting to know that this week will eventually be over, whether i complete my finals or not. -sigh- Have you ever thought about what other people were doing while you were stressing over something? I do all the time. Whenever i'm working my butt off trying to meet a deadline for one of my art projects, i always think about all the people who are just chillin' in front of the television or having fun with friends while i'm slaving away and it makes me feel a little better. That probably sounded really weird and creepy... i'm not sure why that reassures me that everything will eventually be okay.. Why do i find happiness in the strangest things? Anyways, life goes on..

On a less disturbing note,

i managed to finish both of my final drawings today!

YUP, that's right.. i finished my Art final TWO DAYS EARLY :D

HOOORAAYYYY! i feel like a big weight has been lifted from my shoulders!

Now, all i have to do is study for two more finals and then im d o n e

Seriously, studying seems like NOTHING compared to completing an art project

Silent Reverie

We spend all our time waiting for that second chance,

for a break that would make it okay.

There's always going to be some reason to feel not good enough..

and it's hard at the end of the day.

I wish to just fly away from here, from this cold dark town,

from all the vultures and thieves.

I'm so tired of this straight line and the endlessness that i fear.

The storm keeps twisting as i make up for all that i lack.

I need some distraction, a beautiful release

while the memories seep from my veins.

Let me be empty and weightless

then maybe i'll find some peace.

Last Day of Instruction!!!

YAYYYYY!!! THIS IS THE DAY THAT I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SINCE 2ND SEMESTER BEGAN!!

i literally ate all day because we were having "end of the year parties" for all my classes. EVEN CARDIO! we ran to Yogurtland for our last cardio session haha i had the fullest day ever! i'm so ready for bed..

Today i ate..

- 3 slices of pizza

- 4 cubes of brownies

- a few bites of cupcake

- In n Out cheeseburger with fries

- a cup of watermelon

- a bottle of FUZE white tea

- some lemonade

- some fruit punch

- Yogurtland

- a bite of nachos

Why Can't There Be 30 Hours in Each Day?

I feel like i have absolutely NO time to do anything i want to do. I can't believe it is Sunday already. Seriously, where does the time go? I had a full day on Saturday from 9AM till NOW ( 2:40AM) i haven't even showered yet! Infact, i feel like i haven't even had the chance to just sit and chilllll outtt GAH! the worst part is, even though i had a full day i haven't had the chance to do ANYTHING on either of my to do lists! It's so frustrating because i have a whole list of things i WANT to do and NEED to do in my head and it looks as if i have NO TIME for anything that i want to do. All the stuff i did today was sadly, "obligation based".. although it shouldn't have been -.- i can't wait for this semester to be over so i can just completely throw my stresses of projects and grades out the window. At the same timeeeee there are so many things i feel like i want to do before May 22 (which is our last day of school) afterall, IM FLEEING THE COUNTRY THE NEXT DAY! I have a feeling this "last week of instruction" isn't going to be as easy as i was hoping for it to be..

Things i NEED to do before May 23rd:

- my in class drawing

- my final graphite drawing project

- come up with sketches for the iphone game

- write a testimony

- go through my closet for unwanted clothing to give to Bobbie and Emily

- catch up on a billion sketch book assignments that i've procrastinated on

- Pack up all my stuff to move out of the dorms

- Pack again to go Japan

- STUDYSTUDYSTUDY for finals

Things i WANT to do before May 23rd:

- hang out with a few individuals

- go to gethsemane at least 1 more time

- finish the book 90 minutes in heaven

- trim my bangs

- go shopping (just so i can take a breather)

- start VBS decorations

- come up with sketches for iphone game

- photo safari

Things that i <3 at the moment

1.) Poppies

there are so many pretty yellow, orange, and pink poppies around campus

2.) AMTV

it provides me with a random shuffle of music as i play "Draw My Thing"

3.) Hot Cheetos YUM!

4.) "Draw My Thing"

it has taken over my sleeping time

5.) Deli News Pizza in Long Beach

it's a cute family owned place that has medium pizzas for $4.99 with the best pizza dough everrrr!

6.) my AE flip flops

7.) 90 Minutes in Heaven by Don Piper

i bought this during the book sale on campus

it's pretty interesting, not to mention a super easy read

8.) AMP Radio

a great alternative to KIIS we like to overplay songs FM

9.) Anthropologie

We made a trip to fashion island on monday and i was reminded why i try to stay out of that store!.. everything is so cute and EXPENSIVE :(

10.) My 3B pencil

it's hard enough to not make me feel like I'm shading, and soft enough to erase without leaving dents in my paper

True Exhaustion

Although this has been BY FAR the most stressful week of school EVER, this week actually went by pretty fast. Tuesday-Thursday was the worst though! at one point i was literally running on no sleep. I was awake for 36 hours straight!! My official new record is staying up till 10AM doing projects for art class. I think i finally experienced exhaustion at its finest. Today i didn't even have time to eat until dinner -.- i always thought it was stupid when people said they "didn't have time to eat" but NOW I KNOW THAT'S ACTUALLY POSSIBLE! Thank god thats over with.. I feel like i can finally breathe although my weekend isn't exactly free :P at least im not meeting any deadlines!!